Lots of thoughts running through my head right now.
Wei, Jack, Chrissy, the Slackers, school, my life.
Let’s see…
Wednesday night.
I was awaken from a comfortable sleep at 11:30pm by my cell phone beeping a message. I was surprised that I didn’t have the earphone in as usual, surpressing any audible noise. So, I slid around to get the phone from underneath the futon. I saw the messaging envelope on the phone, thinking it was the BSPN.com Insider alert giving me the Angels’ score. … I still don’t know the score.
Instead, it was a voice mail message. I figured it was a call from one of The Slackers, probably Lynne. After all, she had called the night before. On seeing her number, I mistakely got excited thinking I got a job call, only to discover upon dialing the number that it was Lynne, wondering how a meeting — that she arranged and failed to show for — went.
However, on this Wednesday night, it was a voice mail from Wei. I hadn’t written or spoken to Wei since Chinese New Year when I dropped him a few lines just to let him know I was alive and hoping that we’d get a conversation going — or something.
The common thread between The Slackers and Wei is that nothing is going on in either place.
So, in retrospect, it’s quite amazing that the simple voice mail from “Thomas from San Jose” got me in such a frenzy. I was informed that he got a job that would bring him to Los Angeles weekdays with him returning to San Jose on weekends. If the job ran long-term and an alternative in SJC didn’t pan out, then he would put his house on the market… and, presumably, move to the Southland.
Well, despite the succinct summary just written, it took several replays of his voice mail for me to “get” the message. It’s not that Wei is indecipherable, but rather because I let my emotions get in the way of comprehending simple English. I spent hours trying to figure out the hidden message in his words, only to realize after much insomnia that his was just a simple message informing a friend that he would be in the area.
But, lo, how to respond?
I finally was able to get to sleep and I awoke with finality at 10:30am Thursday. No school. Tim and I had a furniture assembly follow-up to one Shirley McCorkle. Thirteen days earlier, we had assembled a desk for her, getting it totally completed before discovering that the front cover to one of the drawers didn’t fit and the drawer wouldn’t close properly.
So, I spent the time from 10:30 to about 12:15 reading the DHTML Tutorial that I’m going to work on in lab today. Then I showered and dressed and we went off to fix the desk. It turned out to be a simple adjustment and we were there and back by 4pm, stopping along the way for Starbucks, my mail — of which I had none — and laundry quarters — of which I did none. Laundry, that is.
After Tim came back from his workout, I fixed some chili and rice while he showered and talked to his brother, Tom. We ate, drank some wine and played beginner’s cribbage until Trish came home.
The three of us ate a dinner of chicken and leftover rice (from the chili) while watching Dr. Greene die (on ER).
To bed, to sleep, to awaken to a myriad of thoughts and hopes about Wei. All the while me wondering how I’m going to play this out this time.
While Tim was working out Thursday, I called Thomas’ voice mail and left a brief message saying how interesting it was that he would be in L.A. and that I would call back sometime during the Friday or the weekend when I was in a high-cell area. And, of course, how good it was to hear from him — which it was.
You see, one of the things I’ve decided during my exile to south Orange County is to focus my relationships on those who bother to dialogue with me. That crowd is sparse. Which probably accounts for Three’s Company FROM HELL, but that’s another story.
Wei has made it quite clear in the past that he didn’t love me “that way” even I did him. He also wondered aloud whether we should maintain contact. So, in the months that have psat, especially since Chinese New Year, I let contact with him go, telling myself that is what he wanted.
Now, I don’t know what he wants.
Or what I want.
AGAIN!
Will wonders never cease?!
[06:21]
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